When did the insurance companies become drs??

I've been denied the remotest chance of access to strong sleeping aides...not emphasizing costly--tho out of pocket..yeah kinda cuz the generic and regular are exactly the same cost...WTF. Insurance co basically has told me that regardless what happens, there is no way in hell they will ever consider this med the dr want me on..even if I go thru all the other ones like insurances often require as the proof that a dr actually knows better than a damn group of stingy fat cat CEOs that just love to make like miserable for us peons will no say in the system...

yes..I know..I'm ranting the say crap over and over.. I apologize. Technically I 'slept' the last few days..the night before I used some OTC thing...its a generic of one of them and since they really all only contain the one ingredient I don't think it really mattered what it was. It mostly worked, just took a while to put me to sleep and while it didn't leave me as muffled and muddled as the amount of benedryl my system currently need to put & keep me asleep all night--I was worthless yesterday. Although, yesterday was also the day after my infusion..so that day is usually rough for me..so I don't think those two things combined very well for me =(

Last night, I had what my insurance felt should be the Holy Grail of sleep: ambien. I woke up every time muscle twitched, blanked shifted, a car passed outside (which I shouldnt have really been able to hear w/ all m hearing probs) then the people's dog somewhere behind us started howling, yipping, screeching somewhere about 6 am.

I don't know which house but I've called animal contrl 3 times cus this dog is left alone outside for many hrs at a time. we have triple digit weather frequently...I consider that a bit cruel..even if the dog has shelter cuz even a small enclosed wood or plastic pet hut is not gonna cut the heat for hrs at a time. Unfortunately, that hasn't done a bit of good and every day I'm sitting here listen to the dog howl and whine...

I had the hope of some of my agitation and problems atleast being somewhat helped and alleviated by the thoughts of getting some decent sleep...I know dr's aren't miracle workers...but when all I'm wanting is a sleep good enough that the little twitches of my fingers don't send me bolting upright and I can feel--better than I do now--then maybe Dr Peery might be a miracle worker for me....if the insurance company doesn't eff the whole thing...

more fun and games

This coming Friday 9/11, I go under the proverbial knife again..yep more surgery. This time my ENT is patching the hole in my R eardrum. Technically, there won't be much 'cutting', its really just a skin graft but since the best way to place it is thru the nasal cavity, they prefer to do it under anesthesia..

Now, my last Sx was supposed to be a 45 min procedure and ended up being 4.5 hrs and 3 day hospital stay w/ pancreatitis..I know..different body part, different circumstance, and a lot more invasive, but its still a little sobering

I honestly stop and think to myself--the last one was a truly life & death necessary kind of Sx (gallbladder removal). This one is more of a quality of life to improve the fact that I can't hear well out of ears and they continually pop, hurt, drain, and are susceptible to infections.. Am I playing Russian Roulette, being a fool? Considering this will be the 9(?) surgery on my ears...I'm probably what people would call foolish anyway, but most was done long before age of consent (pre 16)